Some meals can change your life

By: Nigel Alston | Winston-Salem Journal
Published: December 18, 2010

“Some meals can change your life,” the blog post stated. That was enough for me to want to read the rest of the message and think about the meals that have impacted me. It was about more than food, though; it was about the experience of sharing a meal.

I remember years ago sitting with three friends in the Mayflower restaurant eating a platter of fried shrimp, flounder, hush puppies and slaw. It was during that meal that one member of the group announced that he was leaving his job to pursue a larger mission focused on the future. We all admired his risk-taking; his courage to leave the known for what seemed to be an uncertain future.

That uncertain future that we couldn’t see at the time turned out to be full of promise and everything he envisioned. We often talk, not only about the decision made and shared that day, but where we were and what we were doing — eating a meal.

“It is Thanksgiving, and a good time to read this piece,” Scott McKnight wrote last month on his blog, Jesus Creed. He was referring to an article written by Adam McHugh about a meal that he recalls every year about this time.

“The meal that changed my life featured an oversized helping of pre-packaged lasagna. Truth be told, I don’t like lasagna,” McHugh shared. “But 15 years ago, lasagna became for me the very embodiment of hospitality, to the point that I can’t see a piece of lasagna without being taken back to that meal.”

It took him a long time to understand the significance of that meal and connect it to the situation of the family he shared it with. It was “store-bought” lasagna and, McHugh noted, the “family’s food ration for the entire week.” A mother, father and two children were living on a small income and about to share what they had left to eat for the next week. “Stephen had served me an overflowing portion of something he couldn’t afford to give,” said McHugh.

Another meal I remember involved the same three friends. We tried to fellowship with each other as often as our schedule allowed and this time, it was to celebrate. One member of the group had cancer and had been notified that it was in remission. He had been through a challenging time and this bit of good news was reason enough to share a meal and celebrate. And we did. Our wives joined us and we ate, talked, prayed and gave thanks for the miracle of life. That was a special night I’ll always remember.

McHugh finds himself reflecting during this time of year on how significant the act of eating is to our lives. It is nourishing in more ways than digesting the food.

Just last week I enjoyed another meal at a table with people I didn’t know but shared a common connection with. During the course of our conversation, Dr. Win Tillery asked me a question: “Have you heard of the B-1 U.A. Navy Band?” I had not.

What followed was a brief history of the first all-Negro band of World War II, which included a local resident, Robert E. Brower. Tillery has taken on the responsibility to keep the memory of the band alive, share how it helped integrate the Navy and ensure the legacy of the group is preserved.

As he promised, a few days later, I received a package from Tillery that was titled “The Forgotten First: Band One and the Integration of the Modern Navy.” I will share more about the band in another column.

I will remember that meal more for what I learned than what I ate that evening. I agree with McHugh: “A life-changing meal is not defined by what you eat, but by whom you eat it with.”

What meals have made a big impact on your life?

Nigel Alston lives in Winston-Salem.