Wade long enough through the worst that human nature has to offer and some of it is bound to rub off.
That was the case for me after hearing that a woman had died after being badly beaten.
Yvonne Ann Martin, 48, died at Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center hours after a neighbor discovered her Wednesday evening in an abandoned house on Gray Avenue.
A glance at Martin's record shows a sad, familiar pattern: Repeated arrests for the usual array of drug charges -- simple possession, possession of drug paraphernalia, sniffing glue -- go back for years. Her record also indicates the ways she got money to feed her habit: petty theft, forgery and prostitution.
I'm ashamed to say it, but my first thoughts were dark: Addict. Who cares?
Thankfully, that soon gave way to a kinder, more appropriate thought: Yvonne Martin was somebody's daughter. Perhaps she was a mother and a sister. She deserves better.
Known only to a few
Yvonne Martin's immediate family -- her mother and three brothers -- gathered yesterday and graciously agreed to discuss Martin's life even as they grieved (her father had died last year).
The woman they knew was a loving, trusting person. She was the mother of four and grandmother to two. Yes, she struggled with addiction and the obstacles that it brought, but she also kept up with those who loved her, and she returned that love.
"I don't think she had the ability to hate, even those who wronged her," said her brother, Antonio Miller Sr.
After her most recent brush with the law, Martin enrolled in classes to become a certified nurse's assistant -- a move encouraged by her family.
"She really put forth an effort to get that life behind her," said her mother, Mary Davis. "We know she had roadblocks, but she was somebody special to us."
The final kick in the pants for Martin came this spring when she realized what an obstacle her record would be, and saw her efforts to land a job -- any job -- sour.
"That was a real punch in the stomach," Miller said. "I think that really set her back."
Carl Martin, another brother, lamented the hurdles facing those who have done time, and wonders how that factored into his sister's life.
"When you try to push doors open and they slam in your face, how many times can that happen to someone?" he said. "You pay your debt to society, and it's so hard to establish yourself as a human being."
Revealing letters
Obviously, someone's family would choose to remember the best in someone. That's only natural.
But before you decide that's the case here, consider what David Clark, an assistant public defender in Guilford County who represented her, had to say.
Clark found several handwritten letters in his files that show real attempts by Martin to beat her demons.
With more than 20 years in the system, Clark has developed a reliable sense of people.
Citing his client's confidentiality, Clark didn't want to disclose the exact nature of Martin's letters, but he did allow that she wasn't someone who was trying to get something over on others.
"I can tell you that her letters paint a picture of a woman who seemed to have a desperate and genuine desire to get some help," Clark said.
Yvonne Martin didn't deserve to die the way she did. She was a mother, a sister, a daughter and a grandmother. She struggled, but she never gave up hope.
"She was loved and she will be missed," Davis said.
Certainly she deserves better than a horrible, knee-jerk assessment of her life.
ssexton@wsjournal.com
(336) 727-7481
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