Spend less and still feel the love from your Valentine

You can't force romance. This year, you can't afford it, either.

Lover boys and girls, never fear. Chances are you're neither in the mood nor the market for the lavish Valentine's Day meals of yore, those of aged steaks and marked-up wine and the predictable finish of crème brulee. A negative side effect of those heavy meals -- they induce sleepiness, not sexiness.

No, this year, think lean and mean. Think of it as a challenge -- 30 bucks and some change equals a Winston-Salem date, no driving to Greensboro allowed. I didn't say that you won't have to dig around in the couch for funds.

• The ribs, pulled pork, beef brisket and other meats at Bib's Downtown (675 W. Fifth St., 722-0007, www.bibsdowntown.com) will win the heart of your carnivorous significant other. The ribs fall in just the right place between saucy and dry, moist, plump and blissfully fatty, while the beef brisket is so

soft that it falls apart with a push of a plastic fork. Crunchy bits of char, a slow-cooked patina, edge the smoked meat. The peppery hush-puppies are something special.

• The Cloverdale Harris Teeter is not the most romantic place in Winston-Salem, but it is home to Thai Sawatdee (2281 Cloverdale Ave., 725-1332), where you can crunch up ground chicken wrapped in lettuce leaves and lap up hot penang or mild green curry thick with eggplant, peas and carrots. The wide, stir-fried spicy rice noodles are also good, and maybe you could eat them Lady-and-the-Tramp style. They beg for a cold beer, though. Eat your meal in the small (no soft lighting) dining area overlooking the produce section, or get takeout with a six-pack and head for your bear-skin rug at home. And, if you go for lunch, the specials' prices are insanely low -- $5.95 to $6.95 for an entree with soup and two spring rolls.

• La Botana (1547 Hanes Mall Blvd., 768-6588) will impress a date who thinks that Mexican food in Winston-Salem stops at quesadillas. The menu has cactus and carnitas a plenty, though the best dishes are usually to be found on the specials menu. My current cravings are the shredded chicken wrapped in soft corn tortillas, liberally lashed with salsa verde, and tacos with grilled steak and bacon, a dish of dense, volcanic salsa on the side. Even if you don't get those tacos, you can ask for some of that salsa to dip your chips in. Just do it sparingly, at least at first. It's hotter than George Clooney in a tuxedo.

La Botana also has soups large enough to share -- molcajetes, or bean-based broths that come with an assortment of protein or vegetable, steaming in a tall stone bowl.

Fair warning: The Texas-sized margaritas could push your meal beyond the $30 budget, so watch out. It's hard for me to resist the breezy caipirinhas (Brazil's national cocktail, but at home with La Botana's lusty food), but they add up quickly, too.

• Who said sandwiches aren't romantic? They are finger food.

May your love be as lip-smackingly zesty as the spicy tomato bisque at Mozelle's (878 W. Fourth St., 703-5400, www.mozelles.com), and made extra delicious by the very fine pimento grilled cheese with bacon. Share a basket of fried green tomatoes and okra with sweet potato aioli and an open-faced meatloaf sandwich at Sweet Potatoes (529 N. Trade St., 727-4844, www.sweetpotatoes-arestaurant.com). Or head over to Mary's Of Course Cafe (301 Brookstown Ave., 725-5764, www.marysofcourse.com) for breakfast-at-lunch. Consider the fluffy and fabulous breakfast burrito. Or for lunch-at-lunch, a finger-licking messy turkey Rueben dripping with sauerkraut and Russian dressing. Should your lover hate meat, tempeh is also an option.

• Even if you want to -- or can -- spend more than $30, going out for lunch instead of dinner at a pricier establishment will cut your bill considerably. Perhaps you found some money on the street. Lucky you. Just don't reach for the wine list.

Still, frugality is a turn on. Since Feb. 14 falls on a Saturday this year, you'll have time to linger over lunch with your sweetie. Winston-Salem's list of swankier restaurants that serve weekend lunches is short, but they're out there: Milner's American Southern (630 S. Stratford Road, 768-2221, www.milnerfood.com) and Bleu (3425 Frontis St., 760-2026, www.bleurestaurantandbar.com) are two upscale-ish options with lower priced, midday menus.

These sound like possible aphrodisiacs to me: Braised pork shoulder with peach-jalapeno chutney and grilled mahi-mahi tacos at Milner's, or sautéed red trout with warm pecan vinaigrette at Bleu. Or you could skip the entrees and snack your way though the appetizers. How about duck-and-chicken-liver terrine with raisin-pecan bread or seared sea scallops with preserved lemon-cream sauce and sage gnocchi?

Hey, you can even still get a steak at Milner's -- the hanger is $12 at lunch. You'll pay $5 more at dinner.

Being a cheapskate never looked so dreamy.